The Argument at the Grocery Store: Why Living in Japan is Better Than Living in the West - It's a Part of the Culture
Sunday, April 12, 2015
I just came back from my second trip tonight to the grocery store to buy booze. I'm kind of drunk now. The grocery store is a 3 minute walk from my house.
I've been drinking booze. Did I say that I'm drunk, now? I did? OK.
As I walked out of the store, there was a couple arguing about something.
But, in Japan, when a couple are arguing (outside a grocery store or wherever), it isn't anything like what happens when a couple argues (outside in the parking lot of a grocery store or anywhere else) in the USA.
People in the USA and the west argue and they like to scream.
In Japan, people are reserved and they aren't wont to make a scene; there's no shouting or making a "scene."
Making a "scene" in Japan just won't do, you see.
The couple that were arguing outside the store I just came back from were arguing in hushed voices. I couldn't understand what they were arguing about. But they were definitely arguing about something.
The last time I was in America, I was at a Ralph's supermarket grocery store parking lot, I saw a couple arguing in the parking lot; they were screaming at each other and throwing stuff at each other out of their grocery cart.
It was like bloody murder!
The guy (I guess he was the husband) was screaming at the top of his lungs about something to do with a 25 pound bag of dog food versus a 50 pound bag of dog food.
Not exactly a life-ending crisis, but screaming bloody murder they were. People there must be quite stressed out (or drugged out).
He was shouting, "You didn't tell me to buy the 50 pound bag!"
I think you could hear him screaming at the top of his lungs from a mile away! He seemed furious over such a trivial matter.
That would never happen in Japan. It seems to be normal in the west.
The couple I saw who were arguing at the grocery store near my home in Japan, were arguing in hushed tones. That's because that's how Japanese people argue; they never scream and shout.
In Japanese language (and culturally) there's no reason to shout and raise one's voice.
It's just not a part of the culture.
And, as they say, if you want to understand the culture, you have to understand the language.
In Japanese, you never know what someone is going to say until you hear the last word in a sentence.
For example (in Japanese): "To the store to go buy groceries I go not."
In English, "I'm not going to the store to buy groceries."
In English, I know before even half way through what you are saying if your intention is negative or positive.
In Japanese, you have to listen to the last word to know one's intent.
This is why there is no "ping pong effect" in Japan where people interrupt each other mid-sentence and start arguing. In the west, whilst speaking English, you can interrupt because you already heard the intent halfway through any sentence...
"I am not...." and so forth.
This makes for Japan to be a much more peaceful place. That's just the way it is.
That's one more reason why Japan is a better place to live than the west if you want to have some peace. It's also why you never hear Japanese people interrupting each other and screaming - whether they are speaking Japanese or English.
It's just not a part of the culture.
Hopefully, it never will be.
Trust me. It is inconceivable that this guy is going to raise his voice and yell about anything! It's just not a part of the culture. Ain't gonna happen,